Loud Noises in the Cover of Darkness

Last night, there was a loud boom or thud or something that we hear on occasion that indicates an explosion in this war torn country.  I didn’t think anything of it because sirens weren’t sounding and I have grown accustomed to loud noises and earth shaking effects.  The lights flickered on and off for a minute as though the generators could not decide if they wanted to continue working or take the night off.  The final decision was to take the night off, as so many of us would like to do the same; the generators are the only ones with the guts to take action.  The lights went out right as I decided to grab a book to pass the time prior to falling asleep. 

I cheered a bit in my head because it meant my roommate would have nothing to do but go to bed.  It also meant the fan would be off and I could warm up for once.  But on the down side, it meant the water heater would not continuously warm water for my 430 shower.  My roommate returned from doing laundry.  Luckily, she was in the process of pulling her items out of the dryer when the power shut off.  The First Sergeant had handed out head lamps to the females, so we were walking around our blacked out building looking like coal miners the rest of the evening.  My roommate had a fake candle that she turned on, so as I entered the room after a trip to the bathroom, the flickering “candle light “ made it appear as though she was having some sort of prayer ritual in her area.  One of the females called the billeting office to let them know our power was out and began to spread the rumor it would be out until 0600.  I began to prepare myself mentally for a cold shower in the morning.  My roommate, while folding laundry, became flustered because the internet was out as well. 

Neither of us thought about flipping the light switches off, so when the power came back on at 0200, our room was as bright as daylight.  I arose from my bed to turn the lights off; my roommate was sitting up in bed on her phone, checking the internet most likely.  I went to the bathroom to discover the lights were still off even though the switches were in the on position.  I continued to prep myself mentally for a cold shower. 

Two and a half hours later, as I shut my alarm off, I grabbed my towel, my shower caddy, and a bottle of dry shampoo just in case the water was too cold for a shower, at least I would have clean hair.  The power was still out in the bathroom.  I said a little prayer and continued to the shower stall.  I flipped the nozzle up.  Cold water spewed out.  I told myself to give it a minute; nothing was for sure just yet.  I noticed the shower curtain start to move towards the flowing water, a good sign the water was getting hot.  I tested the temperature of the water with my hand and it was hot!  Thank Jesus! 

When I got to work, I was informed the power outage was post wide.  I’ll bet we have some pretty tired electricians here this morning that deserve a day off!

Easter and a 5K!

Our Easter grill out went fantastically well yesterday.  We cooked hamburgers, lobster tails, boneless chicken, bone-in chicken, and hot sausages.  The weather was gorgeous at a sunny and 74 degrees.  We played corn hole and I was called a ringer, a person that acts like they are no good and turns out to be really good.  I guess they forgot I was from Ohio where we hold corn hole tournaments.  We also had an Easter egg hunt in the street that passes by the front door of our building.  Of the 30 eggs hidden, I found one and it was not one with a prize in it.  It was small and pink with a tiny fuzzy chick contained inside.  One egg contained ten dollars, another contained a note from the First Sergeant dismissing the finder from one PT session, and the person that found the most eggs received a $15 iTunes gift card.  As half of my forehead became sun burnt and my stomach was filled past capacity, it was time to leave.  Granted, I started my day with a box of Girl Scout cookies, s’mores flavored goldfish, Reese’s Pieces, and a slice of cake (that’s right, the days of snacking have returned with the end of Lent…although it lasted until 1000), I made up for it at dinner with a salad and a cup of fruit as I sat and watched my unit place first in the Flag football tournament. 

I arranged with the new CPT to come in at six this morning so I could run in the Sexual Assault Harassment prevention 5K.  He agreed which meant I was not only able to run in the 5K, but I also was afforded the opportunity to sleep for an extra hour.  That extra hour made a world of difference.  I woke up not wanting to get out of bed, but I had the extra motivation of the only reason I was able to sleep this additional hour was if I was running this 5K.  My roommate mentioned the night prior that she was going to run with me.  She went to the extent of laying out her PT’s so that, in her words, she had “no excuse” not to run in the morning.  As my alarm sounded, she clearly announced she was not going. 

I wore my long sleeve PT shirt and shorts completing the outfit with my reflective belt and eye protection.  It was a warm day out, but not too warm to make me reconsider the long sleeve cotton shirt.  The sun was coming up and it was weird starting the race in daylight.  I always try my best, especially at the beginning of the race.  I was supposed to link up with a runner from one of our units because he runs a 25.  I wanted to pace off him so I could improve my time.  I could not find him, so I focused on my form and keeping a continuous pace.  Towards the two mile point, I started to become tired but I noticed there was an older gentleman keeping pace right next to me.  I decided to keep with him.  He and I bounced off each other and silently motivated each other to keep pace.  At times I fell behind and at times he fell behind, but we always kicked it in to catch back up to one another.  The last twenty feet of the race, he kicked it in and sprinted.  I, on the other hand, had given the race my all and could not muster the strength to sprint.  I came in at 26:06, a new personal best.  To top off the morning, they were passing out bananas after the race.  I have not seen a banana since I was back in the States.  They were perfect, slightly green and full of flavor.  They were not mushy or bruised, just perfect bananas waiting to make me feel better after such a rewarding run. 

Happy Easter

Happy Easter everybody!  I found my Easter Basket!!  Thank you Aunt Carol for thinking of me on this wonderful Easter holiday!  This holiday reminds me of the time I ate my entire Easter basket in one day and woke up around two in the morning puking chocolate into my hair and onto the hallway floor.  It stank so bad that Dad had to cut a square out of the carpet where I had vomited.  That patch of carpet is still missing serving as a constant reminder of what too much chocolate can do to a person.  For Lent, I gave up snacking.  Not only did I lose eight pounds and realize just how much I snacked, but I think I also picked up a healthy habit.  This morning as I sit here, allowed to snack once again, I find that I have no urge to snack.  I’ll give it a week and let you know how long it lasted.

This Easter season has successfully shown me what a bad Catholic I have been all my life.  I have learned that Jesus was captured during the feast of Passover, tried over night, and crucified the next day.  I originally thought all this happened over the course of a week at least and had no idea multiple religious remembrances were occurring.  How were my eyes so closed?  I have been a Catholic my entire life and yet, here I am in Afghanistan feeling like I have been clueless, like a light bulb suddenly turned on in my dusty attic of a brain.  What were they teaching us all those years in religion classes? 

I am also learning to put away my anger with people.  Instead of becoming angry and confrontational, I pray for them.  I pray that their ignorant eyes are opened.  I pray that whatever made them the way they are today can be forgiven in their hearts and allow them to live a fuller life full of peace, trust, and acceptance.  I pray for the strength to swallow my anger and turn the other cheek, the patience to accept them for who they are, and the wisdom to pray for exactly what they require to heal their souls. 

Facebook Funnies

It is my belief that people are naturally jokers.  People who are too serious simply have yet to find their funny niche.  When there is a prank to be pulled, there is no doubt that it will be executed, especially around here.  I was talking with the computer techs today when they informed me of a prank they pulled on a co-worker that had me laughing to the point of tears.

This co-worker is known for hacking other people’s FaceBook pages, often times leaving messages on their wall detailing something they would consider embarrassing and is never true.  We will name this person J.  J left his computer logged in with his FaceBook page up while he left to take care of business.  His co-workers took advantage of his absence and immediately attacked his FaceBook page.  They left posts on his wall to the effect of, “Why is it ok for people to like children, but it’s not ok to say you like 12 year old boys?”  Like I said, embarrassing false statements.  To top it off, they switched his page to Russian.  When he returned, he had no idea what his FaceBook page said, but to further frustrate him, he didn’t know what button to push to “Delete” the post, “Like” the post, or “Share” the post.  No one in the office was willing to help him figure out how to switch it back to English.  Luckily, FaceBook has a cool option to translate posts into English, so he soon found out what was posted by looking it up on someone else’s page, but was still unable to figure out how to delete the post.

No worries, he figured out how to switch it back to English around seven o’clock that night.

Women's History Month

I arrived at work yesterday to find a bag of trash in the middle of the female’s bathroom floor.  It was neatly bundled with a sign lying on top of it stating, “This is what happens when you don’t clean on your day.”  I shook my head.  Someone took the time to bundle up the trash quite nicely, search for a piece of paper, a sharpie, to write a nice little note, all in the time it could have taken to simply take it out.  Instead of taking out the cute little bundle, I instead added to the note stating, “And obviously this sign took care of the issue…One Team!”  I know this didn’t solve the issue either, but hopefully it gave someone a chuckle.

We celebrated Women’s History month yesterday.  The 1^st Sergeant lined all the ladies up in the hallway, thanked us for our service and for being female, and handed us a framed picture of Afghanistan with photos of all the females in our unit surrounding the country.  It was a sweet gesture.  When we were asked for a speech, I took the opportunity to thank my mother, father, and God for making me a female.  I think this is the first and only time I will ever speak those words, LOL! 

 

Breakfast this morning was peanut butter French toast.  A delicious combination I originally discovered in college while sitting with the football players.  I went for a good run yesterday, outdoors and not on a treadmill, (2.3 miles in 20 mins), so my muscles were screaming for some type of protein.  Peanut butter it was!  Pay no attention to the donuts on my plate, they are just there for decoration…until you aren’t looking and then they will mysteriously disappear.

 

T.G.I.Fridays

The flight nurse is proving to be a fantastic addition to our room.  I left work yesterday unknowingly returning to the room in time to bid the flight nurse a good workout as she left for the gym.  I was excited because this meant the room would be quiet for a while and I could nap.  My plans were to enjoy a run after work, but I just couldn’t pass up the opportunity of having a nap in a quiet room.  It was a fantastic nap and it lasted two dreamy hours ending when the flight nurse returned from her workout.  It was time for mine.  I left for a run, swallowing my dislike of people watching me, my disgust for breathing dust, and my distain for running.  I actually had a really good run.  I ran into a couple of Air Force guys who were also running and amused myself by out running them.  I could tell they took a hit to their egos just by the way they were acting on their run.  They would pass me, keep steady for a while, then stop to take a sip of water or catch their breath.  I was keeping pace with them when they were in front of me, but I think they became tired of me passing them because at one point they crossed the street to hide from the embarrassment of being passed by a girl.  My amusement ended when I decided I had arrived at my turn around point and they decided to continue down the road.

When I returned to the room, the flight nurse immediately asks if I want to go to dinner.  I look down at my sweaty, stinky self, chuckle and say, “I kinda need a shower first.”  She started talking to me about her workout, the book she was reading, and how she doesn’t think she is going to make it out tonight.  My roommate returns and asks if I was going to T.G.I.Fridays with them.  “Oh, you aren’t going to a dining facility tonight?  Let me hurry up and shower then.  Do ya’ll mind waiting?”  I asked.  I was suddenly motivated to shower, change, and go to dinner with them.  I will do anything to break away from the monotony these days. 

As I was showering, I was hit with a sudden urge to sing so I began to sing “Somewhere Over the Rainbow” from the movie “The Wizard of Oz” as I lathered up.  The bathroom suddenly became awkward as I realized I was singing a duet with an unknown female that obviously knew the words better than I.  I quickly squashed my urge to sing and focused on the task at hand, preparing for T.G.I.Fridays.

As we sat down in the restaurant, all eyes were on us.  Imagine four females walking into a restaurant giggling, smiling, and happy to be alive in a combat zone.  We were definitely the group that was not like the others.  We were seated in a booth and the flight nurse immediately started talking about appetizers, burgers, and her healthy eating habits.  We ordered the fajita chicken nachos to share as an appetizer and I fearlessly tore into some jalapeños.  I have always been too scared to eat jalapeños because I have never enjoyed extra spicy food, but last night I took a bite out of fear and it was good!  Being the females we are, we all had salads for our main meal.  Mine was a chicken Caesar that tasted ok.  My roommate decided to order a brownie sundae for dessert to share amongst the four of us.  Upon the arrival of dessert, the flight nurse quickly shouted out that it was missing the caramel sauce.  When the waiter returned with additional spoons as requested, the flight nurse asked him about the caramel sauce, to which he replied they were out of caramel sauce, but would she like something else in its place? 

“Like what,” asked the flight nurse. 
“Extra ice cream? What do you want” was the waiters reply. 
“Whatever looks good back there.”
“I will make you a small sundae.”

When the waiter left, we all began laughing hysterically.  The flight nurse just received a free sundae because my roommate’s sundae didn’t have caramel sauce on it.  The ironic thing was that the flight nurse was just explaining to us about how good she had become at bargaining with the local shop vendors. 

The waiter returned with a small sundae for the flight nurse.  It had two cherries on it and he made the ice cream with the chocolate syrup look like a face.  We took pictures of the ice cream face which will soon be posted on FaceBook, I am sure.  As we were finishing, the waiter again returned.  The flight nurse thanked him profusely for the sundae and he was impressed she finished it.  The flight nurse explained to him that she was a good eater.  The waiter pointed to my roommate and said, “She looks like she is the good eater.”  We were in shock, but we understood there were cultural differences at work here.  We started laughing hysterically and somehow the waiter turned the conversation to say that my roommate had a good digestive system.  When he left, the flight nurse turned to my roommate and asked her what just happened because she was lost in that conversation.  We were laughing so hard we were crying as we recreated the conversation. 

We discovered the waiter is from Nepal, India.  In his culture, large women are beautiful and their size depicts wealth.  In American society, thin is in.  The whole time he thought he was giving her compliments while we thought he was calling her fat.  At least we all had a good laugh about it and no one was truly offended. 

The flight nurse had given up hope of finding a flight out of here to the point where she started planning our next going away dinner.  Sadly, our flight nurse boarded a flight last night and left us for her final destination.  She definitely added some spice to our life here and she will be missed.

Flight Nurse

There is excitement in my room that has lasted the last three days.  As my room is used as a transient room of sorts, I have all kinds of interesting visitors stay for a few days before moving on to their final destination.  This week, I had the pleasure of sharing my room with a rather friendly Flight Nurse.  Her job over here is to fly on Medical Evacuation (MEDEVAC) fights and provide in flight care along with the Flight Medics and Flight EMTs.  The Flight Nurse position was recently created due to a need identified by MEDEVAC crews here in Afghanistan.  Since this position is new, the big Army is still trying to create the Standard Operating Procedures and protocols for this role. 

She was only supposed to stay for approximately 12 hours.  She arrived with five large duffle bags, a large ruck sack, and a carry on.  Her luggage quickly overflowed the small space allotted in our room and I found myself tripping over her stuff every time I walked in and out of the room.  Her personality made up for her vast amount of baggage as she was very friendly, happy, and appreciative.  She was a wealth of knowledge and was eager to share it with us.  Her experiences as a nurse were entertaining as she regaled us with stories from her previous deployments, emergency room experience, and her specialty the Intensive Care Unit.  My only grievance was that she didn’t stop talking.  She talked so much that the first day she was with us I went to the gym three times in seven hours to get some alone/quiet time. 

Her initial flight was cancelled, so she was with us for an additional day.  I returned from work extremely tired and found her preparing to go to the Boardwalk to grab some food after her workout.  She told me about how she killed the gym and that she was jealous of our NATO gym because it was so nice.  When she left, I fell asleep and did not give the appearance of waking up when she returned.  I was too sore from the previous day to continue my mad workouts.  When my roommate returned from work, I “woke-up” and decided to head to a dining facility.  They wanted to join me, which was fine; I probably needed to socialize a bit.  My roommate and I took her to dinner at the Asian dining facility.  While there we ran into some of our co-workers, a radiologist and a psychiatrist, and decided to eat with them so they could talk to her for a bit and give our ears a break.  
An hour later, my phone starts buzzing informing me that I have a text message.  I open my phone to see my roommate, who is seated next to me, has sent me a message that simply stated, “Let’s go!!!”  Our guest was in the middle of a story about a man that reported to the emergency room stating he had a bug in his ear.  She told us she pulled a large cockroach out of his ear and I took this opportunity to stand up, say, “That’s it, we are done here,” and start to walk out with my tray.  In true societal fashion, the rest of the table followed my lead.  As we pulled away from the never ending gab, the radiologist takes the opportunity to thank me for ending the gab.  If two of five people did not want to be there, then why did it take me to pull the plug on the social gathering? 

We received word that she was going to be picked up around 1120pm.  Knowing there would be no sleep between dinner and her departure, I decided to check out the PX and head to the gym.  I returned to the room in time to assist moving her out.  As I grabbed a duffle bag, she looks at me and says, “Oh no, that’s the heavy one!”  It was already on my back and I was not having issues with it, so I looked at her and said, “It’s fine, give me another one,” to which she responded, “But, you’re so small!”  I have a love/hate relationship with people who underestimate me.  On one hand it is insulting, but on the other hand I like seeing the surprise on their faces as I lift things twice my weight with ease. 

We all exchanged hugs as she departed.  My roommate and I executed a sigh of relief as we entered the room free of all her stuff and finally free of her chatter.  We both immediately went to bed and knocked out.  At 330am we awoke to a knock on the door.  Her flight was cancelled.  We both arose to carry all seven of her bags back into the room.  My alarm went off at 430am as usual and I did not want to move I was so tired.  The next available flight is tonight…fingers crossed that I will no longer trip over her stuff at 430 in the morning!